Pepsi Reveals Secret Formula of Ice Cubes

NEW YORK—The Pepsi Corporation held a much anticipated public event yesterday which they had billed online as “Pepsi Presents: A Secret Formula Revealing” to a record amount of disappointed people.

The gathering, which was held at Pepsi’s international headquarters in New York, garnered over ten thousand curious visitors eager for a chance to see behind the magic of the sugary drink company.

“We really wanted to let our customers in on one of our biggest secrets” announced Pepsi Co. Chairman and CEO, Indra Nooyi “But everyone already knows how they can get the cool, refreshing taste of Pepsi- they just go to the store and buy one, so we decided to give them the opportunity to find out our most guarded secrets: how we make our ice cubes.”

After this point was made clear, most of the audience had already gone home, but for those who stayed they at least got a beginners science lesson.

“People always say to us, I love Pepsi and all its related products, but it never quite seems like it is in the commercial, what are those clear square shaped items in your glasses?” continued Nooyi overtop of a disgruntled crowd “Those are called ice cubes and today, for the first time ever, I’m going to reveal their secret formula.”

The reveal was that these “ice cubes” were actually only made with one ingredient, water, or as Nooyi called it: Pepsi H2O.

Although anyone who had ever seen ice before were not shocked by the second step, there was an unexpected twist. To make Official Pepsi Ice Cubes, you need to freeze the water in an Official Pepsi Ice Cube tray. Luckily, they were being sold at the event for only $5.99.

Overall, Pepsi failed to impress the majority of their customers and only sold a handful of Ice Cube Trays but reports are that their rivals, the Coca-Cola Corporation, are still making plans to one up them.

According to our sources, Coke is holding their own event this week where they plan on not only revealing their own ice cube formula but also the secret ingredient that makes Vanilla Coke different than regular Coke.